1. |
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The sun hangs lower every year
people in bars finally seems to like me
I’ve been dealing with some fears
I didn’t have when I was nineteen
The nights get longer
I’m more or less afraid
All the time
Moving through a world
that’s not mine
In day I burn for coup de tats
and kick as I
wither on a vine
At night I catch the sun and shine I shine I shine
I’m not that smart
Or complicated
There’s no one out there
more than you
For me
I used to hate the
sound of my own voice
but now I hate the
sound of my thoughts too
my cartoon dream
When you see yourself you’re gonna scream!
Held aloft by some foreign powders
No one’s out there
No one more than you
For me
My enemies
in power
and I
trapped in my mind,
sun hits my tears
turns memories
to steam
When you see yourself you’re gonna scream!
|
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2. |
How Much?
02:57
|
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How much is just one call on your unlimited plan?
The old world hangs on
but the sun is gone
How much do I keep and
how much burns?
You see me
moving through these streets,
astride a horse, in black
I see me gleaming in your eye again
Don’t wait up- I’ll be back at like, 2:30
Padre says I’m filthy, says
no one can be born clean But here I am- bitterness of her womb
and rank sweat of your seed,
and in the witching hour I’m dancing
by the headstones
heady taste,
boiling rage,
brewing up
some fucked up shit to say right to your face around 2:30
(Here it is)
Time hasn’t made us equals-
you pull bootstraps
I pull fire alarms
How much
How much
How much
Do I burn?
|
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3. |
Can U Not?
06:06
|
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When you’d said all you’d said
and fangs were bare, you drove us somewhere
only you knew
I was just a passenger then
Your shroud was growing, unearthly
I jumped up scared and screaming
No one else stirred
I wouldn’t recognize you now
Just some jailor I once knew
Burning toast, and eggs, and everything
While you go grey and curse my name
I know you do
You have to
Y’can’t make me feel bad!
Aren’t we all just shrieking brats?
I’ve been been crawling so long to make it upstairs and take a bite out
of your disinterest
and it made me empty
just like every thing else
Oh, I’d break for you to be proud of me
like you’re proud of that flag
I wouldn’t recognize you now
Just some jailor I once knew
Burning toast, and eggs, and everything
While you go grey and curse my name
I know you do
You have to
I know you do
I’m just you
Mama, I’m you
You know I'm only you
Look what you made me do
Now I see you when I sleep,
But I can't escape into dreams
Did I get all the same blood?
As you,
I'll cut myself loose again, and again
It’s getting late and you should pack
|
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4. |
It's Done
04:31
|
|||
I wanna get you in some other direction
I want to make it so you’re not even scared
I want to pull you from this plane to a new one
I’ll grow and burn the night itself for your tears
I’ll bring you down the dark hall with saving throws
And pull la Lun inside to make you feel tall
I can grow you back from just a seed
Fed energy like light through a straw
With hooks to pull you back out of your sick brain
There will be no more of that less-perfect love
I’m moving plane to plane- always through you
I wanna show you everything that I do
It can be undone-
It’s possible til it’s done
Alive in the head until
It’s done
It always seems impossible
Til it’s done, til it’s done
|
||||
5. |
Oh Hey
03:22
|
|||
“Oh hey” calls for those, by name,
separated by at least those
Fifteen hour flights, some untold lovers
“Oh hey” calls for those last reserves, your parents’ will and decency,
You will respond
Or should your phone go in the river?
Hey man I can’t make that one for you
When it’s awful I got to look away
I can’t see, it’s just awful, awful, innit?
But it’s written there, and shoved right in your face
It just feels so damn final
Oh, it feels just like and ending
Final
Oh, it feels just like and ending, or an ascent
“Oh hey” calls for those, by name, separated by at least those fifteen hour flights, some untold lovers
Shut-in at twenty eight, hey there goes fame, notoriety, all those lusty little— I guess you’re not in the club you like to talk about drunk
Hey man, I can’t make that one for you
When it’s awful I got to look away
I can’t see, it’s just awful, awful, innit?
But it’s written there, and shoved right in your face
It just feels so damn final
Oh, it feels just like and ending
Final
Oh, it feels just like and ending, or an ascent
|
||||
6. |
L-Man
04:46
|
|||
I think I’m ready for someone else’s life
Aren’t you that desert, shining, felching, burning bright?
Oh, beaten down, punched around for having fun, fun.
Nobody here wants to tell you— it’s my birthday, and I’m drunk
(I’m drunk)
Not caught, but highly sus
Precious, petty, gold-plated; you’re unknown.
If you turn the heat up slow enough, the pot still feels homey
I warm up uniformly
Those stray words start to rot your brain if they stay in there long enough
When pulled, as if by chains, against arguing
Now, hasten toward the exits
Did you get all the presents?
Call Solomon to cut the baby into—
I’m living in the moment, the future looks foreboding; I wouldn’t want to go there (go there!) ha ha ha
Oh, weren’t we just holding hands?
No, no little toes in the sand
No, not you and I, babe.
No, not you and I, babe.
Not caught, but highly sus
Precious, petty, gold-plated; you’re unknown.
If you turn the heat up slow enough, the pot still feels homey
I warm up uniformly
|
||||
7. |
||||
I know way too much about everyone here
Jollund do dice
Maggie no care
Shotgun blast demarcates: clout
Alliances and pacts form and just dissolve
just like stars- no rhyme, no reason
Some sketchy little guy’s looking for
ten people looking for
Secret levels, extra lives
(I’m grilled light) for fuck’s sake– pull me through your eyes
Somewhere in my mind’s appendix,
somewhere in my mind’s compost heap
Mute your hellos—turn up your goodbyes
Punk’s in brain and those hooks don’t come back out
Extremely: online & looking to put out
Hair says I care about the year
Arms crossed eyes down towards the rear
I’m a man of culture— Quick exits are good exits
Tell your favorite koan again,
drunker on the hanging meaning,
stooped from making coffee, leaning
Your new name has a pleasant ring and suits, because it’s yours
Somewhere in my mind’s appendix,
somewhere in my mind’s compost heap
Dollar bottles pop and no talk to cop
Figured that one out myself— pushed past black denim underworld to feel the coats stop brushing against my face
and I’m out here, I mean I’m really out here
Nice to be here with y’all, mixing it up with
my fellow low-fellows
Somewhere in my mind’s appendix,
somewhere in my mind’s compost heap
Dragged down again, pulled up by the hair
I know way too much about everyone here
An old friend walks up and kisses me—wow he’s drunk
Long forgotten worlds of straightedge warriors,
show politics/politicians
Specious declarative sentences
on clinging youth crew t-shirts
Jettisoned in favor
Jettisoned in favor
Jettisoned in favor of some clinging sexual attraction
Somewhere in my mind’s appendix,
somewhere in my mind’s compost heap
I am the bottom line
the basic plan
the broken valve
the upper hand
The new-born manimal amalgam
the backed-up van
the hasty glam
your broken screen
the half-watched band
the royal scam
the drinks with dad’s old worker friend
The sub who rolls their eyes
The kick inside
the dream inside the dream inside
the pool we should be breaking in
the Bolivian whiskey glass gallon
the caustic kiss that doesn’t land-
I am that I am that I am
what I am what I am what I am
that I am that I am what I am what I am
You’ve been
Asking
For this
To happen
|
||||
8. |
Late Man
04:29
|
|||
Good luck gettin' it from me that way
More pulling teeth with Occam's hatchet
Some day I might fuck around and be on time
I need somewhere to lie somewhere in that direction
I've found a place to lay between us— gravity pulls you in a direction and you call it "down"
Sumbitch displaced in just a foot of water
I can't float or block out any new sensations; fully frying in the ultraviolet spectrum
You wanted more than I had pegged you for
And so, dragged me down to there
I was full of just like, wild ideas
Until you sucked all the air
Good luck gettin' it from me that way
Pushed down stairs, but I'm the big one
Head over heels, out of here– Sick air on the way out
Spinning night, creeping into dark cartoon stars, and you without horns or tail–
I conjured what I knew and you tore the veil
You wanted more than I had pegged you for
And so, dragged me down to there
I was full of just like, wild ideas–
Until you sucked all the air
|
||||
9. |
Choked
07:32
|
|||
God, I loved you then
Between fiberglass and steel, all those moments, I could feel
Rolling by outside my window, with the lights down low, just to show you care, at least I hope so?
And that girl there did survive 24-48 hours or more, on a craft of her own design
No one there, takes you aside, says “son, art school is where you go to learn how you like to be choked”
The feelings cross the water, they can cross anything
Turn the wheel until the speakers blow— a hard right off the bridge now, flying, only I know how
Would that I could lose the rest of my water, finally disappear, curl up on the sidewalk
Now we both wish I were dust; I for my selfishness and lust, and you for my hurt
With your tiny hands, too small to close around my throat
The feelings cross the water, they can cross anything
I’ve been dragged down, and
I’ve been uninterested, and
I’ve been trouble, and
I’ve been assaulted, and
I’ve been here before
|
||||
10. |
I Shall Be Free
05:19
|
|||
Someday I’ll be free
Someday I’ll be free
And you won’t have me
To push around anymore
Someday I’ll be clean
Yes, I’ll get so clean
And you won’t have me
To talk about anymore
Someday I’ll be sane
Yes, I’ll get so sane
And you won’t have me
To laugh about anymore
Someday I’ll be free
Yes, I shall be free
And you won’t have me
|
||||
11. |
||||
Time isn’t on our side
Time was never on out side,
as it turns out
But right now your name is
still alive
Somewhere in that plague year I realized
you weren’t having any fun
Somewhere in a dream I think I saw a way
to keep the light from going out
Just stay alive for me, baby
Any thing might be coming up next
Floating on some melody,
just slightly out of tune,
but here I am
Only making something beautiful
can get you into heaven
Breathing’s automated, gasping through a collar from some other life— Just try, just hold it in
Everything can be new again
Just stay alive for me, baby
Any thing might be coming up next
Sprawled on some show-house lawn,
I didn’t see it all, but here I am
I am
And all the rollers come up with someone else’s numbers
People you thought were friends, can’t create any meaning (friends)
You dial a random number, and see who answers
Ha ha ha
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GASP Rock Hill, South Carolina
The band from a hat.
The beat orchard.
The foes.
The left hand band.
The human witch kings of rock city.
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